Have you ever found yourself staring into a mirror (or zoning out as you wander through Trader Joe's putting everything into your cart?) and having your "Evil Queen" moment? Mirror, mirror on the wall...Do I have what it takes to be a leader AT ALL?!?

Well, I'm here to tell you that you're actually on the right track. You're thinking about yourself. 

I know, I know...you want to be a selfless leader. But it's really important to understand how to develop your self-awareness and emotional intelligence for leadership success. And if you're concerned about not becoming too self-absorbed, you're probably not going to tip over that line. 

But why are self-awareness and emotional intelligence so crucial for leadership? And how do they intertwine to help you answer that nagging question: Do I have what it takes to be a leader at all? Let's chat.

What is Self-Awareness?

Self-awareness is the ability to see yourself clearly and objectively through reflection and introspection. It's about recognizing your strengths, weaknesses, emotions, and the impact you have on others. In leadership, self-awareness is the first step toward authentic leadership—it’s the mirror in which you see your true self.

Let's check in on how you're doing with your own self-awareness. 👇

• Strengths and Weaknesses: Can you list your top three strengths and areas for improvement?
• Emotional Triggers: Do you know what makes you tick? How do you respond to stress or criticism?
• Impact on Others: Are you aware of how your behavior affects your team?

If you’re shaking your head or feeling uncertain about these questions, don’t worry. Developing self-awareness is a journey, not a destination. It’s about being curious about yourself and having the courage to ask, "What am I really like?"

The Magic Ingredient- Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence is your ability to understand, use, and manage your own emotions in positive ways. It helps you communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges, and defuse conflicts. Think of Emotional Intelligence as the emotional thermostat of leadership—it helps maintain a healthy temperature in your team dynamics.

Emotional Intelligence check-in: 

• Self-Regulation: Can you control your emotions and impulses?
• Empathy: Are you able to understand and share the feelings of others?
• Social Skills: How well do you navigate social complexities and build relationships?

Emotional intelligence is not just about being nice. It's about being real—real with yourself and with others. It's about having tough conversations with empathy and making decisions that consider the emotional ripple effects on your team.

Connecting the Dots: How Self-Awareness and Emotional Intelligence Intersect

The Leadership Feedback Loop

Self-awareness and emotional intelligence feed into each other in a beautiful loop. The more self-aware you become, the better you understand your emotional responses and those of others. Conversely, the more you cultivate emotional intelligence, the more nuanced your self-awareness becomes.

Imagine receiving feedback from your team. A leader with high self-awareness and emotional intelligence doesn’t just hear the words; they perceive the underlying emotions, motivations, and expectations. They reflect on their own role in the situation and respond with empathy and constructive actions.

The Emotional Mirror

Think of self-awareness as polishing the mirror and emotional intelligence as the clarity with which you see the reflections. The clearer your self-awareness, the more accurate your emotional intelligence. Together, they help you navigate the complexities of leadership with a steady hand and a compassionate heart.

So how do we build in the development of these important components to our day?

Self-Awareness Practices

1. Reflective Journaling: Write down your thoughts and feelings after significant events. What did you learn about yourself?
2. 360-Degree Feedback: Seek feedback from colleagues, mentors, and team members. What patterns do you notice?
3. Mindfulness and Meditation: Practice being present in the moment. How do you feel physically and emotionally?

Building Emotional Intelligence

1. Active Listening: Practice listening not just to words but to emotions. What is being said beyond the words?
2. Empathy Exercises: Put yourself in someone else's shoes. How do they feel, and why?
3. Conflict Resolution Training: Learn and practice techniques for resolving conflicts constructively.

So, mirror, mirror on the wall, do you have what it takes to be a leader after all? The truth is, leadership isn’t about having all the answers or being perfect. It’s about being willing to look into the mirror, see your true self, and commit to a journey of growth.

Great leaders aren’t born.

They are crafted through self-awareness and emotional intelligence. They are the ones who face their reflections honestly, embrace their flaws, and work tirelessly to understand and connect with others.

As you stand before your emotional mirror, remember that every leader starts somewhere. The journey toward becoming a great leader is ongoing, filled with challenges, reflections, and triumphs. Your self-awareness and emotional intelligence are the tools that will guide you, helping you navigate the complexities of human interactions and lead with authenticity and empathy.

In the end, the most important question isn't just whether you have what it takes to be a leader but how you can continue to grow and improve. Keep polishing that mirror, and as your reflection becomes clearer, so too will your path to becoming a truly effective and inspiring leader.

So, take a deep breath, look into that mirror, and ask yourself: What do I see? What can I improve? And how can I better understand and connect with those around me? The answers to these questions will not only shape your leadership journey but will also help you become the kind of leader who can inspire and uplift others.

Helping leaders develop their self-awareness and emotional intelligence is a big part of what I do in my coaching. If you're ready to see how I could help, book a free Leadership Breakthrough session today and let's get started!